Pinterest Inspired Me

I do not like to cook or bake.  I did like to bake once upon a time in college but ever since then, I have just hated to be in the kitchen. 

Then I saw this picture of a brownie pie on Pinterest.  Brownies are okay but I'm fine with or without them.  They're not something I ever crave but if my mom makes a batch, I'll eat some.  However, I saw this pie and thought that it looked very delicious and the recipe is super easy.  So I told my family that I would make one for Thanksgiving and I did.  Tomorrow, we'll see how it tastes and if it lives up to my expectations.

Toy Clutter

I decided that we need to downsize Julian's toys before Christmas rolls around.  I know that he's getting new toys and he has a lot that he doesn't really play with. 

Right now, Julian's three main categories of toys are cars, trains, and tools.  Those are the things that he constantly plays with all day long.  So I figured most of his other toys can go.  I loaded up one grocery bag so far and will probably go through some more tomorrow.  There are plenty of other toys here for him to play with since my parents have a playroom fully stocked with all kinds of stuff.  I think I might help them cull a few things from there too. 

Julian has a few other special toys that he likes and I'll just put them away in a drawer for now to be rotated out later.  I keep thinking about all the toys we have in storage that he doesn't remember and doesn't need.  Most of those will be donated as soon as we get the stuff out of storage.  There are a few I'll keep for Mati but I really want to keep toys to a minimum so my kids will really enjoy the toys they do have.

I Am Not Patient

I am horrible at waiting for things.  I never wait until Christmas or my birthday to see if I'll get a gift that I've been wanting.  I just buy myself things when I want or need them.  Patience is not my strong suit.  Right now, I'm waiting to hear if our mortgage loan got approved.  My lender said the process would probably take 3 days.  It's been a whole week now (okay, I know the weekend doesn't count but still).  I've been trying to keep myself busy doing other things but the waiting is driving me crazy. 

At the same time, I'm waiting for Brian to call.  So right now is not a good time for me since my patience is being tested from all sides.  Hopefully I will learn something from the experience.

Sometimes You Just Have to Laugh

Today I was changing Julian's diaper and he started to pee but he managed to pee in his own face before I realized what was happening.  So I quickly blocked the flow but it just kept coming.  By the time he was done, he had to go straight into the bathtub because he had pretty much soaked himself.  I was laughing the whole time (mostly for the times he peed on me when he was an infant).  It wasn't really funny but if I hadn't laughed, I would have probably cried.  There are so many moments as a parent where the situation is crazy or overwhelming and you could just lose it so you have to laugh to release the stress and the tension.

Later in the day, I heard a strange noise from the dining room where Julian was playing.  I went in there to check on him.  He had discovered a canister of oatmeal on the table and emptied the entire thing into an empty Tupperware container that happened to be on the table next to it.  He had spilled hardly any of the oatmeal on the table and he seemed like he was having fun.  I walked into the living room and laughed before going back to help him return the oatmeal to its canister.  He's always getting into everything.  This time, he hadn't destroyed anything or found anything dangerous, he was simply having fun with oatmeal.  I figure maybe that's a new activity we can do together next time.

Not My Day

I went to the doctor today to get some things checked out.  You never want to hear a doctor say, "It's worse than I thought."  It's just not good.  The procedure that followed was even worse.  It was not a happy day for me.  But hopefully everything will be good now.  That's all I have to say.

Gift Giving and Receiving

This is a topic that has been on my mind a lot lately, mostly because of the amazing amount of gifts that people have given to Matilda.  Also, my friend Jen's recent blog posts.  Check out her post from today.

We did not have a baby shower for Matilda.  I didn't want one because we didn't need any baby stuff and the primary purpose of a baby shower is to get stuff. 

My friends in El Paso surprised me with a few baby gifts the week before we left while we were having a Girls' Night Out at Olive Garden.  I really appreciated their thoughtfulness.

Here in Tacoma, my mom decided to host an open house so everyone could come and meet Matilda and hang out with the whole family.  To me, an open house is not a gift giving occasion.  Everyone brought gifts.  And not just for Mati.  Almost everyone also brought Julian a gift and several brought gifts for my niece and nephew too.  This was very generous but I didn't want people to bring gifts.

I know that sounds horrible but I'm not a good gift receiver.  I'm just not and never have been.  You can ask my mother.  I returned many a gift throughout the years.  Since Mati is only 2 months old, I am the one receiving gifts on her behalf.  I have to write the thank you notes (a task I absolutely detest) and I have to be gracious and polite about the gifts. 

Now it's not that I don't appreciate the kindness that people are showing.  It's just that I am extremely, extremely picky.  Especially when it comes to anything for my children. 

Here's an example:  I only buy 100% cotton pajamas for my kids, ones that have not been treated with flame retardants.  Natural fibers are not as flammable as polyester and other synthetics so they don't have to be treated with flame retardants (which are nasty toxic chemicals that children should not be exposed to).   Infant sleepers are not treated with flame retardants but I still don't want my baby wearing polyester fleece.   We were given lots of fleece (and not a single gift receipt).   So I donated the gifts to several other needy families. 

If you want to buy a gift for a baby, do not buy clothes.  Everyone buys clothes and the new parents don't get things they really need (like diapers, wipes, babysitting and a night out).   If you absolutely must buy some totally adorable outfit, then at least give a gift receipt so they can exchange the outfit for something they really need.  That might sound tacky but a baby grows so quickly that often they don't have time to wear all their new clothes so other gifts are way more practical.  A new baby really only needs a few onesies and sleepers in each size for the first several months. 

So please don't buy anything for my kids.  Seriously, don't buy them anything.  They don't need it.  If they do need something, their grandparents will get it for them if I haven't gotten it fast enough.

For me, I don't want candles, lotions or bath products, jewelry, clothing, or anything that will take up space in my home.  If you love me, don't give me anything.  If you must give me something, make it a Barnes and Noble gift card so I can download new books to my Nook and there is nothing more to clutter my house.  (Amazon gift cards are also fine because I buy a lot of music from there and I find other obscure things that I can't get elsewhere.)  Someone please tell my husband this.

I have always loved the other side of the equation - gift giving.  For many years, I have tried to put a lot of thought into what the recipient needs or wants.  I always ask my family members what they would like for Christmas and birthdays and I make a list.  Sometimes I end up giving gift cards but only ones that I know will get used.   Gift cards aren't always a great gift.  I have a $50 WalMart gift card just sitting around in an envelope because WalMart is not convenient here and even if it was, I am not a WalMart shopper.  I am a Target shopper.  It was a generous gift but if it's not being used, it's not a good gift. 

I used to travel a lot and I would buy gifts for my family and friends on every trip.  I didn't just buy whatever touristy crap I could find though.  I had fun finding beautiful scarves, tasty snacks, cookbooks, toys, wood carvings, etc.  Each item was lovingly selected by me for each individual.  Gifts are definitely one of my love languages but now I've realized that people don't need (or want) the stuff.  The best gifts I have received lately are those of service. 

So don't buy gifts for Christmas this year, give of yourself.  Make a meal, babysit, clean someone's house, send a nice handwritten letter to let a friend know you're thinking of them.   If you don't get any gifts, be happy that you don't have to spend time taking care of that stuff. 

Posting From My Phone

I posted yesterday about my addiction to my smartphone (a Droid 2 if anyone cares) but I had never written a blog post from my phone.  So here it is, a post from my phone.

*So the above was written from my phone and then it went all crazy on me so now I'm on my laptop and there will probably be no more posts from my phone.  The kids kept me up all night and I'm barely coherent so this is it for today.

I Love the Internet

The Internet is amazing.  It really is.  I was just thinking about all of the things we used to have that the Internet has replaced.   These are all things I no longer need because I can just use the Internet: phone books, TV, DVDs (for the most part), CDs, radios, books, stores (I do 90% of my shopping online, except for groceries), even phones. 

I'm not saying I've gotten rid of or stopped using all of these things because I haven't but I do use the Internet as a replacement most of the time.  I'm addicted to my smartphone because it has the Internet.  I can read all of my favorite blogs, check my email, update my Facebook status, read books and magazines, send pictures to my friends and family, and add things to my Amazon cart, all from my phone. 

The one thing I haven't done with my smartphone is write a blog post.  Maybe I'll try that tomorrow.

You Know You're a Mom When...

• You have entirely too many conversations about bodily functions.
• You are always the last one to eat dinner.
• You frequently have uninvited company in the bathroom.
• You clean out your purse and find toys and/or crumbs.
• You wake up in the middle of the night with the alphabet song or the potty song (or possibly a cartoon theme song) stuck in your head.
• You have spit-up on your shirt and so you throw on a sweater to cover it up (since there are no other clean shirts).
• You are constantly evaluating the "childproofness" of an item before buying it.
• Your alarm clock has two arms and two legs and has been known to headbutt you to wake you up.
• You wonder if animal crackers and organic fruit snacks constitute a balanced meal.
• You dream of someday getting out of the house in under 30 minutes.

Saturday Fun

Today was a gray, rainy day here in Tacoma.  But we had a fun day anyway.  My parents and I took the kids down to Freighthouse Square where we had lunch.  I had a yummy Vietnamese mango salad and some noodles. 

After lunch, we rode the Link "train" to the end of the line and back.  Julian was very excited to ride the choo-choo and he didn't want to go home afterwards.  He wanted to ride some more (or jump in puddles). 

Mati just chilled in her sling for most of the trip.  I wish I had taken some pictures but I was too busy having fun with my family to get out the camera.

I'm An Army Wife

I have been married to Brian for almost 5.5 years now and we have been separated for almost 3 of those years.  I knew when I married him that deployments were likely but the reality is much harder than I imagined it would be.  We are nearing the end of his third (and final) deployment.  I am happy that we won't ever have to go through it again.  Even though the deployments have been very difficult, I know that both of us have become stronger, both individually and together, because of them.

I am proud to be the wife of a soldier and I wouldn't change it for anything.  I will always be proud of Brian for the many years of service he has given to our country. 

Happy Veteran's Day!

It's the Small Things

This month, I find myself appreciating the little things.  Here are some things I'm grateful for right now:

• Hot showers
• Shirts that are stain-free (I'm finding these hard to come by these days)
• Julian's ever-expanding vocabulary (I love every new word)
• Chocolate
• Cloth diapers (I never have to run to the store because I'm out of diapers)
• Phone calls from my husband
• Baby smiles and giggles
• Pretty burp cloths
• Lemonade (I could seriously drink it by the gallon)
• Being organized (I was able to easily find the papers I needed for the mortgage application)
• My family and friends (even if I only see them on Facebook right now)

Decluttering Update

I started this blog when I was in the midst of a major decluttering project.  We were preparing to move and put most of our stuff in storage for a while.  I originally kept track of everything leaving our home but then it got to be too much because we were so busy. 

We had to be out of our apartment at the end of July and we ended up living in a hotel for a week as we emptied our apartment and then waited for Brian to deploy.

Here's all of our stuff in the POD.

We had some awesome friends come and help us get all the stuff out of our apartment and figure out how to make it all fit in the POD.  We rented a hand truck from Home Depot since we lived in a second floor apartment but the guys who helped us never even used it.  I was very impressed, especially when they moved our washer and dryer.

Here's the POD closed up and ready to go.  I can't believe all our stuff fit in there.

 At the end, we had a hard time deciding what to do with a bunch of stuff.  Should it go to storage or should it be shipped to my parents?  Since we weren't sure, it ended up in our hotel.  There was so much stuff in our hotel room that there was barely room to walk.  Most of the stuff ended up being shipped to my parents' house.  There were about 20 boxes total shipped starting in July until the day we left El Paso.  Some of the stuff probably could have gone to storage but we just weren't sure about a lot of it since the next year of our lives was so up in the air.  So we shipped my clothes and personal things; Julian's clothes, books, and some toys (including his tricycle); lots of baby stuff; most of Brian's clothes; and other miscellaneous items we didn't really want in storage. 

Embarrassing photos of our hotel room with all of our junk.





We also had as much stuff as you could possibly fit in our car while there were three people riding in it. 

When I arrived at my parents' house and saw all the boxes, it was pretty crazy.  Fortunately, my sister was totally awesome and helped me unpack them and get everything put away somewhere before the baby came.  At 8.5 months pregnant, I definitely needed the help.  Now, you'd never know that we brought that much stuff with us because I've hidden most of it away in dressers or in Julian's closet. 

This is what my room looked like shortly after arriving in Tacoma.

I found so many bizarre things that we brought with us that should have ended up in storage.  Two salt shakers (but no pepper), the cord for my Shark vacuum, random magnets that are part of one of Julian's toys (that's in storage), and other fun stuff.  I just took an empty suitcase and filled it all up with this random stuff and shoved it in the back of the cloest.

I realized that I still had a lot of decluttering to do so I've continued to get rid of things pretty much every day (inspired by 365 Less Things, one of my absolute favorite blogs).  Things that have been leaving lately: maternity clothes, baby clothes that Mati has already outgrown (or hand-me-downs that are not right for this season), and toys.  My mom has a free table at work and several of her colleagues are pregnant so everything has quickly found new homes.  I love knowing that stuff I don't need is being used by someone else who appreciates it.

My ABCs

I've seen this on a few other blogs lately and thought it was fun, so here goes.


Age: 36

Bed size: Currently full-size but my bed that's in storage is a queen-size and I'm longing for a king-size once we buy a house.

Chore I hate: Anything in the kitchen.

Dogs: None.

Essential start to my day: Getting out of bed.

Favorite color: Green.

Gold or silver: Definitely silver.

Height: 5'6".

Instruments I play: None currently but in my youth I played piano, violin, and ukulele.

Job title: Mommy.

Kids: Two - Julian, 2.5 and Matilda, 2 months.

Live: Tacoma, WA (previous addresses: Sarasota, FL; Bellingham, WA; Arlington, VA; New York City; Pusan, South Korea; El Paso, TX)

Mother's name: Susan

Nicknames: Beth, Bethy.

Overnight hospital stays:  After giving birth to my babies (and also a few days before in Julian's case).

Pet Peeve: Hand towels that are damp so you can't really dry your hands on them.

Quote from a movie: "I feel like I'm babysitting, except I'm not getting paid."

Right or left handed: Right.

Siblings: One younger sister.

Time I wake up: Whenever Julian starts yelling in my ear or sticking toys in my face, normally much earlier than I'd like to be awake.

Underwear: Always.

Vegetable I hate: Celery.

What makes me run late: A toddler who argues about everything.

X-rays I've had:  My hand when I was in 4th grade.  A gazillion dental x-rays plus some of my back and probably a few others I don't remember.

Yummy food I make: Borscht (but only I think it's yummy).  I really hate to cook.

Zoo animal: Elephants.

House Hunting

I thought that it would be fun to look for a house.  It's really not so much fun.

Here are some gems that I've seen:

1. Neon green basement and the exterior of the house covered with graffiti
2. Huge indoor pool but the rest of the house was completely gutted
3. Two huge bathrooms but three teeny-tiny bedrooms
4. Little old lady house
5. Master bedroom was actually a hair salon and the hallway was covered in scenic tropical wallpaper
6. Stairwell painted to look like an aquarium
7. Cedar shingles and faux brick on interior walls plus wallpaper borders stapled up in the bathroom
8. Cat pee house
9. Crazy layout with small rooms but a twisty slide connected to a shed in the backyard  (My realtor actually went down the slide just for fun.)
10. A place that should have been on Hoarders
11. Cigarette smell and a weird room over the garage

Out of all the houses I've seen so far, there were only two that I sort of liked.  One definitely has more space but only one bathroom and no garage.  The second house had 1.5 baths and a garage but much less square footage. 

I don't have a large wish list for a house.  This is it:
One bedroom large enough for a king-size bed (we don't have one yet but we want one in our new house), 2-3 other bedrooms, a decent-sized bathroom and kitchen, a large living area, and a fenced yard. 

I just want space for the kids to run around and space for me to relax.  The house doesn't have to be updated and modern but it has to have the potential to look good with not a lot of work. 

I keep searching the listings hoping for something new that looks promising.  I'm sure our house is out there just waiting for us to find it.

NaBloPoMo vs NaNoWriMo (and the art of letter writing)

NaBloPoMo stands for National Blog Posting Month and I didn't read the details of it until tonight.  It started November 1st and involves blogging about a specific theme every day for the month of November. 

Since I got in on it a little late, I'm not exactly going to follow the rules.  Instead, I am just going to try and blog every day in November.   Since I missed a few days, I will write some extra posts so that I eventually have 30 posts, one for each day of the month.

NaNoWriMo is National Novel Writing Month.  It also occurs every November.  The rules are that you must write a 50,000 word novel between midnight November 1st and midnight November 30.  No one ever reads your novel unless you want them to.  To get counted as a participant who completes a novel, you just upload your writing to the website and if it's 50,000 words or more, you get a little certificate.  I participated in 2002 and 2004.   I doubt that anyone will ever be allowed to read either of my novels.  I'm not sure that I ever want to reread them.  They were both completely awful.  But I'm proud of myself for having participated and I'll probably do it again someday.

So writing 30 blog posts in a month is a piece of cake compared to putting out 50,000 words. 

Blogging and writing novels is something I never imagined doing when I was younger.  I hated writing.  I actually chose my college major, mathematics, because I figured it would have the least amount of writing assignments.  Seriously.   I did actually like math but I disliked writing more.  My university did require a writing class specific to every major so I had to write several papers about math but I'm still pretty sure that I wrote less than most other majors. 

Somehow as I got older, I found that I liked writing.  It's a way for me to vent my feelings when I'm mad or frustrated but also for me to express when I'm happy and grateful. 

Right after Brian and I started dating, I came back to the States while he was in Korea.  Each week that I was gone, I wrote him a long letter.   After we got married and he left for his first deployment, I wrote to him every day for the first several months.  On weekdays, I would just write a postcard (I had hundreds collected and so I'd just pick one at random each day).   Then on weekends, I would write a two-page letter each day on some funky Korean stationery that I had been given as a gift.   I learned to write letters from my mom who wrote me once a week while I was in college and then every day for over a year while I lived in New York.   My mom's letters got me through a very hard time when I first started teaching and I hope my letters to Brian helped him while he was in Iraq. 

On his second deployment, my letters to Brian were very scarce.  I had a new baby and rarely found the time but I managed to send a few.  This time, I didn't send a single one and I feel horrible but with two kids, things were crazy right after he left.  I have time to write now but they have no more mail service so I can't send him anything.  Hopefully he knows that I still love him anyway.

Someday when my kids go off to college or move away to a different city, I'll write them letters occasionally to let them know that I'm thinking of them.  If I'm lucky, they might write back.

9 Weeks

I can't believe that it has been nine weeks since I gave birth to Matilda.  It seems like just yesterday and yet at the same time, I feel like she's been with me forever.  My life is so much better (and more difficult) with her in it. 

September 4th started out like every other day.  I really didn't think that it was going to be "The Day."  At 9:07 am, I felt a contraction.  I had been having contractions for weeks, so no big deal.  For some reason, I took note of that one though.  I started to keep track and they were coming about every 15 minutes.  They weren't painful or even uncomfortable.  After a couple of hours, I realized that the contractions were the real thing.  I called my sister, Amanda, to give her the heads up since she would be the one going to the hospital with me.  I wanted to labor at home for as long as possible before we left so I finished packing my hospital bag and spent some time playing with Julian.  Then I took a shower and even shaved my legs.  I decided to braid my hair in two braids to make sure it wasn't in my face during labor (I hate my hair getting in my face).  My contractions were getting closer together, about 8 minutes apart, and they were getting uncomfortable.  I was sitting on my bed talking to Amanda when a contraction hit.  I felt like getting on the floor and kneeling while leaning on the bed to try and get more comfortable. 

All of a sudden, I felt a pop and I realized that my water broke.  A few days before, I had told someone else that they shouldn't worry about their water breaking at home because it happens to less than 10% of women.  Well, it definitely happened to me.  At that point, the contractions came quicker and harder.  I told Amanda we needed to leave for the hospital.  It was right about 2 pm.  The ride to the hospital was painful.  I felt every bump in the road and my contractions were coming every 4 minutes.  When we got to the hospital, Amanda parked near the ER and ran in to have someone come get me with a wheelchair.  It took several minutes for me to manage to get out of the car and into the wheelchair.  The elevators are on the other side of the hospital so it was a long ride and very uncomfortable. 

When I got up to Labor and Delivery, they put me in a triage room where I stayed forever.  They had several people asking me the same dumb questions over and over again.  I was so frustrated and the triage nurse kept moving the monitors on my stomach and it was driving me crazy.  I was 5 cm dilated when I got there and by the time they moved me into a delivery room, I was 8 cm dilated.  The only reason that they finally moved me out of triage was because I said I felt like I had to push.  I would've said it earlier if I knew they would move me.  There was a shortage of L & D nurses so the Triage nurse stayed with me the entire time.  They let me have my way with most things (I wore my own clothes, had only a Hep-Lock, delayed cord cutting, and no Pitocin ever)  but they kept those flippin' monitors on me constantly and the nurse kept moving them trying to find the baby's heartbeat.  I know I yelled a few times in frustration but I really wanted to cuss her out and rip those monitors off. 

For most of the time I was in labor, I just kept my eyes closed and squeezed my stress balls and tried to manage the pain however I could.  I wanted to get through it without drugs and I knew it was almost over but it was so intense.  Finally the nurse thought I should get up to go to the bathroom.  I didn't think it was a good idea but she and the doctor said that I needed to get up.  After several minutes, I managed to sit up and get my legs to the edge of the bed.  At that time, another nurse walked in and asked what was going on.  They told her and she said I would have the baby in the toilet if they made me go to the bathroom.  That's when they all realized that I was already pushing so they swung my legs back up on the bed and about a minute later, Matilda was born at 5:20 pm.

I felt like I had just run a marathon and won a medal.  It was exhilarating.  Matilda was placed on my stomach and I just couldn't believe that I had given birth to her so quickly and without any pain medication.  I wanted them to wait to clamp the umbilical cord but the cord was kind of short so for the first minute or so, I just looked at her lying there and touched her head.  Once the cord was cut, she was put on my chest and I wanted to cry at how beautiful she was. 

The pediatric nurse was impressed at her size and asked me to guess how much she weighed.  I think I said 8 lbs 12 oz.  She said that was probably close.  It was actually 8 lbs 15 oz (1.5 lbs more than Julian when he was born).  I knew she was going to be big but it was still surprising.

In these last 9 weeks, she has grown so much (in fact, she has outgrown two sizes of clothing already).  She is amazing and when she smiles at me, it makes my whole day brighter.  I can't imagine my life without her.